A reader asks: “I’m embarrassed to say I’m in a bit of a pickle—or should I say, the pickle is in a bit of a rut! Sex used to be my favorite activity, but lately my boyfriend and I seemed to have prematurely aged into a pair of passionless pensioners, and we’re only in our early thirties. This is my longest relationship yet, and we have sex regularly, but it feels like we’re both just phoning it in. I’m not ready to retire to boring bedroomsville. How can we fire up our fizzling flames and we add more sizzle in our smashing?”

A reader asks: “I’m a 36 year old guy and I’ve been struggling with getting and staying hard with my girlfriend recently. It’s humiliating! I used to be able to easily maintain an erection and lately I just want to avoid sex because I don’t want to run the risk of it just being another disappointment. How do I get my mojo back?

A reader asks: “My partner and I have been together for 5 years and in the beginning the sex was fantastic. We moved in together a couple of years ago and since then, it’s apparent that I have a much higher libido than she does. We get along great, she’s a wonderful partner in so many ways, it’s just really demoralizing that she isn’t all that interested in sex and doesn’t initiate very often. To add insult to injury, she isn’t always responsive or eager when I make the moves on her. It’s gotten to where I don’t even want to try very often because I don’t want to pressure her and I don’t want to feel rejected. Help!

A reader asks, “My husband and I have been monogamously married for 8 years. For the past year or so I’ve been fantasizing about opening up. I love my husband, I’m happy in the marriage and don’t want to fuck anything up, but I find myself daydreaming about having more freedom. I brought it up with my hubby and he is willing to explore the idea of opening up, but we’re a little overwhelmed at where to start.”

A reader asks, “I’m really curious about exploring kink and BDSM. I have fantasies of being dominated, but I don’t know exactly what I want to do (or have done to me), and I don’t know how to bring it up with my boyfriend. I’m not looking to go full on whips and chains, but I don’t know where to start. It’s overwhelming! And to top it off, I’m embarrassed because I consider myself a strong, independent woman, and this desire to be dominated feels like a betrayal of my feminist principles.

A reader asks: “I’m single on Valentine’s day and really bummed about it. I’m burnt out on the dating apps and I feel like everyone has a boo but me. What should I do?”